10… 9… 8… 7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… HAPPY NEW YEAR! The ball dropped, everyone in the bar is hugging and kissing each other; except for me. I got an awkward side hug and an explanation that she loved our conversation that evening, but she wouldn’t want to pursue it any further. I had started the day not feeling all that great, and it turns out that I ended the day feeling pretty similar!
Those that know me know two very important things about me. 1- I’m incredibly social and love making new friends and am seldom alone when I’m out and about. 2- I wear my heart on my sleeve and tend to fall for new friends and relationships quickly and very hard, which tends to get me hurt more than anything else. So how does someone like me get an awkward hug on New Year’s Eve? Well, long story short, I fell hard for someone that did not feel the same way for me and didn’t bother to make backup plans due to how I felt about her… go team dating life! To make the situation even better… I had planned out to meet up with several people at the place I was at to celebrate, but none of them showed. Luckily, I met up with old friends and a couple of new ones, so I wasn’t completely alone and hating life haha.
I suppose that I should probably make a new year’s resolution or a promise to myself for this new year… maybe to not be so quick to fall into someone, go a few months without a beer or to work out 20 out of 30 days a month (don’t lecture me, I know that some months are 30, others are 31, and then there’s the red headed stepchild of February that we won’t talk about… I get it. Don’t remind me of the flaw in these words)… But I don’t want to make promises that I either won’t keep or will make me feel confined into a set path that then makes me more than likely to fail at my goals.
I never want to change who I am in order to meet someone that compliments who I changed into again. I’ve done that before and it ended disastrously. But I AM willing to make improvements that are personal and not made in an attempt to attract someone worthwhile that can truly appreciate me for who I am. So I suppose I have my own personal list that will be my to-do list for the new year… I’ll be finishing my Associates Degree in May and will hopefully start working towards a promotion in my new company. I think that those are great places to start for now, more to follow in the future!
Oh… and I’ll be a little more proactive with this blog. I have allowed this to fall to the sideline with how busy I’ve been with work and school starting up. I’ll make the time in the day to write again since there was so much positive feedback from when I was doing this regularly!